AITA for confronting my husband after I found out he was cheating with my best friend?

I (30F) have been married to my husband, Sam (33M), for 6 years. We met in college, and our relationship was something out of a fairytale. We clicked instantly, got married two years after graduation, and started building our life together. We had similar dreams, shared values, and everything seemed perfect on the outside.

My best friend, Lisa (30F), and I have been inseparable since high school. We were the kind of friends who told each other everything. She was the maid of honor at my wedding, and I always considered her part of the family. She was there for me through every significant life moment—both good and bad. I trusted her completely, and I trusted Sam too. I never imagined that something could go wrong between the two people I loved and trusted the most.

The first signs that something was wrong were subtle. Sam started coming home later than usual from work, and when I asked him about it, he always had an excuse: "A late meeting," or "We’re working on a big project." At first, I brushed it off, but the excuses became more frequent. Then, I noticed that Lisa and Sam were spending more time together. They would talk for hours on the phone, and when I asked Lisa about it, she’d laugh it off, saying they were just catching up.

I didn’t think much of it until one evening, when I came home early from work to surprise Sam. I walked into the living room and found him and Lisa on the couch—sitting very close to each other, laughing, and drinking wine. I stood there for a few moments, unsure if I was overreacting, but something didn’t feel right. When they saw me, they both froze. Sam quickly stood up and tried to act normal, but I could see the nervousness in his eyes. Lisa, however, didn’t even flinch. She just looked at me with a strange expression—almost guilty.

I tried to ignore it, but the more I thought about it, the more my gut told me something was wrong. The next day, I checked Sam’s phone. I know some people might think it was wrong, but I had to know the truth. I found a series of messages between Sam and Lisa that shattered me. They had been texting for months—talking about how much they missed each other, how they "couldn’t wait to see each other again," and how they had been secretly meeting when I wasn’t around. I felt like my whole world collapsed in that moment.

I confronted Sam and Lisa. Sam initially denied everything, saying I was misinterpreting their friendship, but Lisa didn’t even try to defend herself. She looked down, avoiding eye contact, and then admitted it. She told me that it started as just “getting close” and “comforting each other,” but soon, things escalated, and they crossed a line.

I was speechless. I felt betrayed not just by my husband, but also by my best friend. I never imagined that either of them would betray me like this. Sam begged me to forgive him, promising that it was a mistake, and he didn’t know how things got out of hand. Lisa, on the other hand, apologized but didn’t seem nearly as remorseful as I expected her to be. She said she didn’t want to hurt me but that she had feelings for Sam that she didn’t know how to handle.

I told both of them that I needed space to process everything. For days, I was a mess—crying, angry, confused. I felt like I had lost two people who were supposed to be the most trustworthy in my life. I couldn’t get past the idea that my husband had betrayed me with someone I considered my sister.

After a lot of soul-searching and speaking to some of my close friends, I decided to confront Sam. I told him that I could never trust him again. I explained that the betrayal went beyond the physical affair; it was the emotional connection they had shared behind my back, the lies, and the lack of respect. I told him that I couldn’t stay in a marriage built on that kind of deceit.

I also had a conversation with Lisa. She was devastated, but she tried to justify her actions by saying she didn’t mean for it to happen. She claimed she never intended to hurt me, but I couldn’t understand how she could be so selfish. She was supposed to be my best friend, and she had destroyed our friendship and my marriage. I told her that our relationship could never go back to the way it was.

Now, I’m in the process of divorcing Sam. We’ve agreed to co-parent our kids amicably, but it’s hard. I still love him in a way, but I know I’ll never be able to get past the betrayal. As for Lisa, I haven’t spoken to her since that day. It feels like I’ve lost a part of myself, and I’m still healing from the pain.

Some of my friends say I did the right thing, but others think I should have worked through it with Sam, especially for the sake of our children. They argue that people make mistakes, and he should have a chance to prove himself again. My family is split too—some say I should forgive him, while others are proud of me for taking control of my life.

So, AITA for confronting my husband and ending my marriage after I found out he was cheating on me with my best friend?